I couldn't possibly make this sh*t up.

Too tired

I told a bunch of stories at work today. Various people said “Oh that would totally make a good blog entry, right?” And I said “Yeah, but I’ll never remember it by the time I sit down to write.” It’s so true. Blank stare. Ummm, something happened today, and I can’t remember any of it.

Jack made fun of my shoes “Aww, lookit your little pointy shoes. They make a really annoying sound when you walk Mom.”

He didn’t like the way I cut up his pancakes for dinner “You KNOW I like them in STRIPS so why did you cut them into SQUARES???”

When we’re in the middle of playing he stops and asks me if we can play. I never understood that one. “Mom, can we PLAAAYYYY???” “We are playing.” I point out. “Not right now we’re not! You’re talking!”  “Sighhh…” Can’t win that one can I?

Jack had a really excellent day at school. I asked him how come it was easy to behave today and not so easy on other days. “Oh I can do it whenever I want to. I just don’t always want to. Sometimes the words just have to come out and I can’t stop them.”

And then the fun circus Jack put me through right after dinner. I was trying to clean up so we could go and play. Jack had other ideas.

Jack: Mom, I’m hungry for a snack.

me: You just ate dinner.

Jack: So? I want chocolate.

me: You’re not having chocolate. Too close to bedtime. How about fruit with a little whipped cream on top?

Jack: EWWW I hate whipped cream. (I know for a fact that he does not hate it, but whatever)

me: Don’t even go in that cabinet. What would you like then?

Jack: Peanuts! But you have to peel them for me. It’s soooo harrrrrdddd. (he feigns collapsing on the floor)

me: Okay, I can get you some. (I start cracking peanuts onto a paper plate)

Jack: (tries to climb up onto the chair at the counter, slips and cracks his funny bone) OwwwwWWWWW! Mommy!!!

me: (drop the peanuts and run around the counter) Here let me rub it. Please climb up normally. You always get hurt this way.

Jack: (gets back down) I’m gonna look at this stuff on the fridge.

me: (back to the peanuts) Well I got 2 done…sheesh…

Jack: Oh Mom come look at this. I can’t find the next window to open on the countdown calendar (Cars themed Advent calendar)

me: Jack, let me finish one thing please.

Jack: But I can’t FIND it!

me: You have like 4 peanuts here. I hope you’re not too hungry.

I back up and trip over the cat bowl that was left there because … Oh do you really want to hear this… because Bella will eat all of Ed’s food if we leave it over there next to her bowl. So we bring it over here and put it in the microwave for safe keeping after Ed eats a few bites. Then he meows when he wants a few more bites. This can go on for an hour or more until he’s eaten all of his food. Up, down, open microwave, close microwave, trip on bowl, back in microwave, meow, back out of microwave, shoo Bella away, put back in microwave. Accidentally turn on microwave thinking it’s my tea, but it’s actually cat food. Sigh. Yeah, that’s more information than I needed to share.

And you wonder why my mind goes blank promptly at 8:30pm.

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