I couldn't possibly make this sh*t up.

Yeah, sure whatEVER you say…

Jack: You know, there’s a better way to do that.

me: Cut the lemon?

Jack: Just do it on the counter like Daddy does.

me: I use a plate.

Jack: He doesn’t have to wash a plate.

me: Good point. Someone has to wash the counter.

Jack: But that’s your job.

me: Skating on thin ice you are.

Jack: That’s like Yoda! Do or not do, there is no try.

me: Haha!

Jack: Can we play now?

me: I have to finish cleaning this up so Bella doesn’t eat the leftovers.

Jack: Why don’t you —

me: (interrupting) Yeah Yeah, hey if you have all the answers, just do it for me whydontcha?

Jack: I just know a better way to do it.

me: Well, we ALL can’t be as perfect as you Jack.

Jack: Yes you can! You’re just not trying!

He said that with an actual sincere smile. He really does think he’s perfect. Awww, well he is in my eyes…usually…unless he’s being a little sh*t. He did eat all of his dinner: Grilled salmon, mashed sweet potatoes and fresh pineapple (actually had seconds!), and his manners cleared up once he had food in his stomach, so that’s a good thing.

It was actually a nice afternoon. I can see the lawn again, filled the birdfeeders and Jack (gasp) got to ride his bike in the driveway! Oh please let Spring be very close. Jack’s sitting next to me in my bed reading while I type away. The cats are lurking around wondering if I left any salmon laying around on the counters…

Jack: What does “parental warning mean”?

me: That something might have bad words in it so parents shouldn’t let little kids near it. What’s it on?

Jack: A CD in my book. I thought it meant you would get caught by your parents if you forget to plug your headphones in because it’s loud. See I’m always getting the wrong idea about stuff!

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