I didn’t actually SAY those words, but I was thinking them the other night, when after 3 nights in a row Jack said “Eh, you don’t have to read me a bedtime story. I’ll just read by myself for awhile”. I sat on the floor next to him and watched him read. He was in MY chair! I’ve been sitting in this chair for 6 years! For bottle feedings, scary dream soothings, story time, nap time, and countless other times. It was very surreal.
me: Are you SURE you don’t want me to read to you?
Jack: (patiently puts his book down and looks at me) I said you don’t have to. You’re being distracting.
me: Oh. (sulk)
I did sit with him for an extended amount of time after he climbed into bed. He cuddled with his “friends”. The thumb didn’t wander towards his mouth. I noticed how the lump under the blankets is so much longer than it used to be. Sigghhh…
Jack: You sighed. Does that mean you’re bored?
me: No! Not at all. I was just missing our story time. I like to read to you.
Jack: But I know how to read.
me: I know, but it’s a special time for me, that’s all.
Jack: Do you want to read to me tomorrow at breakfast?
me: Like at the counter? haha.
Jack: I don’t know.
me: I’m okay. You’re just a big boy, that’s all. Goodnight.
This morning I pulled out a book and tried to read to Jack at breakfast. Jack said he’d already read those stories and was more interested in finding a book that he could read on the bus. That’s his new favorite thing. I used to be just like that when I was 6. Though I walked to school until Junior High, but anyway…
Okay, I had to get that off my chest. Glad you could listen. He’s totally sitting on my lap in that chair tonight dammit!