I took Jack to the doctors this afternoon because he’d been complaining of a “popping” noise in his right ear. He mentioned it again today when he was eating pretzels.
Jack: Mom, my ear hurts when I chew!
me: It does? Like how?
Jack: It’s sooo sore and it makes a popping noise or something.
me: Didn’t you say it was hurting last week?
Jack: Last week it was squeaking when I blew my nose.
me: I guess we should have checked it sooner. We’ll see if we can get you into the doctor and they’ll look at it.
Jack: Will I get a shot???!!!
me: No, they’ll just peek.
It turns out there was a little fluid in each ear, but not an infection per se. Sooo, we wait and see what happens I guess. Jack pointed out how very brave he was at his appointment.
Jack: Mom, wasn’t I brave when I thought there would be a shot?
me: But there wasn’t a shot.
Jack: But there COULD have been a shot. I didn’t know that.
me: Yes you were brave.
Jack: Every time I’m brave at the doctors, we go to McDonalds.
me: You’re right.
Jack: Can I go and get a happy meal?
We pull up and I ask for a happy meal. They ask me “boy or girl” and I say boy. Then the screen lights up with our order. Cheeseburger happy meal. Boy toy. Milk.
Jack: Mom, I see that I’m getting a Boy Toy. Luckily they knew I was NOT a girl.
me: I told them “boy”. Didn’t you hear me? Then they put “boy toy” and you read it. Get it? Boy TOY. A toy for a boy.
Jack: Boy toy, Boy toy Boy toy, that’s all you ever talk about. How about you get my food lady.
me: Heyyy, no “lady” business.
Jack: I only say that when you’re doing something I don’t like. Now forget about your little boy toy and I’m hungry!
me: I’m not Madonna you know.