So, let’s see, where was I?
Because who needs more proof that I’m brain dead. I certainly don’t. I’ve already forgotten why I’m in here typing. And who the heck are you??
me: Jack, you can’t eat a book while you read dinner, so please put it away!
Jack: (blank stare) The book or dinner?
me: What? You…!! sigh…
Jack: Mom, my yogurt was frozen but my juice was warm.
me: Really? (I thought back to the night before…) Oh I think I meant to put your juice in the freezer so it would thaw by lunch. Sorry.
Jack: I don’t like choking on ice crystals in my yogurt.
me: Jack can you please grab me the… that…(I wave my hand around) the THING over there!
Jack: There’s like a hundred things over there.
me: The round thing with the…OH the tape. Can you hand me the tape please?
Jack: (eye roll)
Jack: Where is Chewbacca?
me: (blank stare) What?
Jack: He’s not in his cage.
me: What are you talking about.
Jack: ChewBACCA the CATERPILLAR?
me: OH! heh heh, yeah he’s in the dirt molting.
Jack: I can’t believe you forgot who Chewbacca is.
Jack: Is my camp shirt ready for tomorrow?
me: (…) I have no idea. Hmmm.
Jack: Is it dirty?
me: Hmmm. (I look in the dryer where all Jack’s clothes are tumbling)
me: Nope. You can wear this other yellow shirt. You’ll blend right in.
Jack: I’m always settling for second best.
me: Get used to it.
me: (driving Jack home from camp) Jack it’s really important that you try to be a good friend at school so I don’t want to hear that you were (blah blah blah) and they won’t appreciate it, and how would you feel if (blah blah) so I really think that…
Jack: (looks up from his book in the back seat) You missed the exit.