I couldn't possibly make this sh*t up.

Ya wanna see my collection?

This was "Spider Man" face paint. Doesn't last long on a 6-year-old.

 

Jack: Ya wanna see my collection?

me: (naturally my guard goes up) Of what…?

Jack: I can’t tell you.

me: Won’t I know when I see it?

Jack: (pauses) I’m trying to figure out where to display it.

me: (minor cringe) Jack, is it alive?

Jack: Hmmmm…should I do it up here or…

me: How about outside.

Jack: No! It’s almost bed time. I have to stay inside.

me: Okay, how about your little red table in here?

Jack: I’m not sure I’ll fit…

me: What do you mean “I’ll”. What is it a collection of, please?

Jack: Ha ha ha ha ha! My naked body parts! (he runs down the hall in his undies laughing hysterically)

 

This has been the real week of “naked boy”. I can’t keep this kid in his clothes. You think he’s calmly watching a video and then you walk in the room and he has no clothes on and his feet are behind his ears. Really. No mother deserves that view.

So after the naked show and tell (I’m sure Google is gonna send me a whole bunch of new friends with that search term) we sat down and read a story, and Jack climbed into bed. He worried briefly about ghosts and if they were good or bad, and then he finally fell asleep.

It was just brought to my attention that Bella was on the counter licking the top of my lemon blueberry bread. Fresh out of the oven. So if I happen to offer you a piece tomorrow, don’t worry, I’ve scraped the cat spit off. Really.

Motherhood…there is no equal.

“By and large, mothers and housewives are the only workers who do not have regular time off. They are the great vacationless class.” — Anne Morrow Lindbergh 

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4 responses

  1. I like the part about wondering where to display it. Like you hadn’t already seen it!

    August 7, 2011 at 12:14 am

  2. Kim

    Must be something in the air… Dickies been letting his buttcrack hang out for months!

    August 7, 2011 at 1:56 am

    • Yeah what IS it?? Jack was never one of those kids that ran around naked. It just started happening this summer. Weird.

      August 7, 2011 at 11:50 am

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