Jack: Will you rub my back before bed?
me: Of course!
Jack: And my hair?
me: Totally. We can read a story and I’ll give you a little massage.
Jack: Awesome! Can I have a snack in bed??
me: No, this isn’t a day spa…
Jack: You can give me sips of water while you read and massage me. hahahaha!
me: Very funny. Even though you think I’m your slave, I’m not…
Jack: Remember, all moms are slaves.
me: Yeah…pffft…
Jack: Okay so start massaging! How about my feet?
me: Sure. Give me the little hooves…
Jack: Ahhh this is the life. Where’s the story?
me: I can’t massage your feet and hold a book, now can I? I was being a little ambitious. (I massage him for a bit)
Jack: (yawning) Jack getting sleepy.
me: Good. Have a good night sweetie…(I make motions to start leaving)
Jack: HEY LADY! I PAID FOR 2O MINUTES AND THIS WAS ONLY 10. WHAT’S THE BIG DEAL???
Sh*t My 18-Year-Old Says 
Too funny! Jack cracks me up. Where does he even come up with this stuff? Keep doing what you’re doing, he seems to be such a great kid.
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Thanks! I’m thinking at this rate I must have to run out of material. But then he wakes up and starts talking sh*t. LOL!
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I am certain that my life was dreadfully boring before I had kids! Jack is a keeper, for sure!
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So true. I mean, what did I DO with myself??? I can’t even remember. Oh yeah…sleep… haha!
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Sounds like the voice of experience there…
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I think all men have this particular inner voice. Sigh…
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