I couldn't possibly make this sh*t up.

Glasses are cool when you’re 7. So is chess.

These are the glasses that Jack chose for himself. Blue Converse.

Jack doesn’t want to be a “geek”. We found out that he needed to get glasses, and his first thought was “I’m going to be a freak!”. How do you even have that thought at age 7. Then after a little time to think it over, he realized that he could pick out totally cool frames, and uh… actually SEE? So the glasses idea became much cooler in his eyes.

As far as the “geek” name goes…Jack would prefer to play chess over checkers, prefers reading to building a model airplane (I know because I built this little bitch this morning with no instructions! The fighter jet of course. And I had fun, because I LOVE to build things.), he knows VERBATIM, all of the Star Wars movies, and always asks me hard questions like “who’s worse, a battle droid or Jar Jar?” IDK!! Well Jar Jar annoys the P outta me. And he would sit for at least 4 days solid playing video games before he would start to notice the stench of his own filth surrounding him, and would possibly realize that he’s thirsty.

Anyway, I didn’t want to break it to Jack that he might be on his way to becoming a geek with or without the glasses.

Jack: The king goes on that side, Mom.

me: Oh.

Jack: I’m black and black goes first.

me: Naturally.

Jack: Okay, let’s cut to the chase and get this show on the road.

me: Now you sound like an old person.

Jack: Look at these moves! They’re awesome!

me: A modest old person.

(we play for awhile)

Jack: Sooo, I’ll just take your knight and this horse is going to MY training school and when I’m done he comes back BLACK. Hahahaha!

me: Sigh. Pay attention. I just got you in check.

Jack: You can’t get the Queen in check.

me: Huh? Oh… Sigh…

Jack: I’m already planning my counter attack. Hahahahaaaa!

me: I’m glad you’re having fun.

Jack: I always have fun when I win.

me: I know.

Jack: Heyyyy, you didn’t even realize that you moved your rook right into my line of fire. I’ll just blast him off the board!

me: Oh, how silly of me. (At that point I would have done anything to get the game over with just a little quicker. I was SO tired!)

 

These were my choice. But I think Jack’s new glasses suit him perfectly. Plus, he got to pick them out all by himself!

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6 responses

  1. He’s conning you. White always goes first.

    July 29, 2012 at 9:52 pm

    • Thanks for looking out for me! We were actually playing with a magnetic checkers set that has chess symbols embossed on top of them. So technically, I was red, but I think black should always go 2nd… That little stinker. 🙂

      July 29, 2012 at 10:01 pm

  2. lol – he does sound like a handful. I have an 8 year old who sounds almost exactly like your son. Geek in the making, but just don’t make him LOOK like a geek. Actually, my son has worn glasses since he was four. So, I don’t think he realized they weren’t cool yet. And honestly, very few kids pick on his glasses, so we were lucky. I just want to add I love reading your blog. It cracks me up. Especially since I’m in the same boat. I’ll just grab an oar.

    July 30, 2012 at 12:02 am

    • Thanks for the nice words. I think we’re ALL in the same boat if we have boys around this age. It’s so funny how we can all tell the same stories about our sons, which probably means all the drama is normal and this is how they all grow up…! You’re ahead of me, so where is your blog? I need a preview of what’s to come!!

      July 30, 2012 at 10:57 pm

  3. Marie

    Madison was really upset she didn’t need glasses. We had to get her fake ones. =p

    July 30, 2012 at 12:45 am

    • I think Jack would have been upset too, after all the buildup!

      July 30, 2012 at 10:57 pm

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