I couldn't possibly make this sh*t up.

Mother’s Day Weekend! (sort of)

Screen shot 2013-05-11 at 7.44.12 AM

 

(our conversation Friday night as I put Jack to bed)

Jack: How do you make oatmeal? How long does it cook?

me: Depends. Instant or regular.

Jack: The kind we eat.

me: Minute 30 seconds.

Jack: Ok.

me: Why…

Jack: Nevermind. I made you something for Mother’s Day! But if you’re annoying to me you’re not getting it.

me: Jack…

Jack: Sorry.

me: Is it in your backpack perhaps???

Jack: Yes! But I’ll give it to you when I’m ready. Maybe tomorrow can be Mother’s Day!

me: Every day is Mother’s Day.

Jack: No! It’s just once a year!

me: I mean that we’re mothers every day and you’re my little boy every day. Now try to go to sleep ok?

Jack: Oh. And remember not to be annoying…

me: (warning tone) Jaaaccckkk…

Jack: (giggles)

me: What?

Jack: I farted.

me: Oh come on. What do you say?

Jack: Thank you.

me: No, what do you say when you…

Jack: Sorry!

me: Sigh. I’m looking for “excuse me”

Jack: For what?

me: (omg) For you tooting.

Jack: I didn’t fart. I just said the words “I farted”. I didn’t really.

me: Then why say them.

Jack: Because it’s funny, that’s why!

me: Awesome. You’re a piece of work!

(Bella is barfing her breakfast up on the white carpets…hold on!!)

Jack: I can say words that don’t actually mean I did them you know.

me: Okay goodnight. Let’s make this a great Mother’s Day weekend!

 

(this morning, 6:30)

Jack: Can I turn on the light?

me: (grunt) ok…

Jack: Happy Mother’s Day! He waves a construction paper card at me.

me: Wow, how beautiful!

Jack: You like it??

me: Yep!

Jack: Wait right here. (much commotion in the kitchen while I doze). Here you go!

me: Wow, oatmeal, thanks! Here put it down, it must be hot. Let me read this card again.

Jack: (eyeballing the oatmeal) Can I try your oatmeal? I’m starving!

me: Ha ha, yeah sure. (we end up splitting it and then have a crazy game of tickle torture)

So, I’m hoping that all of you moms out there have a great weekend and that your old-enough-kids attempt to make you breakfast in bed. This is the first year that Jack has attempted it by himself of course. It was really sweet.

(omg, Bella is on round 2 of barfing hold ON!! And Ed’s friend the birdie is back at the window. Every day this week now. The bird tweets, Ed meows…it’s really cute)

Okay I’m back. Cleaning up cat barf is part of being a mom, eh? Oh, and holy crap… I just saw what Jack did to the kitchen. O. M. G.

 

Here’s Ed and his birdie friend (click to enlarge and look closely on the window frame):

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Jack, the champion speller in 3rd grade (he did a great job!):

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8 responses

  1. Love it!!! Happy Mother’s Day.

    Like

    May 11, 2013 at 7:48 am

    • You my friend are QUICK! Same to you!!!

      Like

      May 11, 2013 at 7:49 am

      • I just let my 16 y/o drive at 6:30 am. My adrenaline is way UP!! 🙂

        Like

        May 11, 2013 at 7:51 am

      • I can’t even imagine Jack driving. It’s hard for him to walk sometimes. ha ha.

        Like

        May 24, 2013 at 1:24 am

      • Scary stuff!!

        Like

        May 24, 2013 at 9:32 am

  2. My boys always love to announce when they’ve farted. And to be quite honest, it IS kind of funny:) Happy Mother’s Day!

    Like

    May 12, 2013 at 2:48 pm

  3. Bie

    Happy Mother’s Day! I hope to be a cool mom like you when I do have kids 🙂 Oh my, Jack is getting so big now. When will you let him read his/your blog? Whose blog is it anyway lol!! you write it but it’s about him.

    Like

    May 13, 2013 at 10:27 am

    • Thanks for the nice comment. I feel sort of cool. Ha ha. Jack just said “you better not be putting that on Facebook or your blog!!” 🙂 he’s on to me…

      Like

      May 22, 2013 at 8:07 pm

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