I couldn't possibly make this sh*t up.

Any guess as to why he’s hurt?


Perhaps because he’s a giant 8-year-old trying to fit into a baby shopping cart?


Jack: Guess what? “Friend” totally eats stuff off the cafeteria floor at school.

me: Ew, come on Jack, no way..,

Jack: He totally does! One time he found a cookie under the table and he picked it up and ate it!

me: I hope you don’t do any gross things like that?

Jack: It wasn’t even in a wrapper. And it had a bite taken out of it.

me: Sigh.


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