I couldn't possibly make this sh*t up.

Itchy and Scratchy

Could you even guess that I’m sitting on the couch eating smoked chicken, watching Breaking Bad (the pilot, I’m a little behind on TV), with my hair in a bun looking around at my stripped clean house.

Ever have a head lice infestation? Well let’s hope your little kiddies don’t come home with it.

Lets just say I had a hunch. Jack and I played catch after school. I decided to go through his hair. I don’t know why. I saw a few white dots. Not many. Then one little louse. I pinched it out of his hair. I couldn’t be sure so I looked again and found 2 more. Bleh. You never seen anyone drive so fast to the pharmacy.

Jack: Ohhh is this badddd??!

me: It’s not good but it’s ok. Don’t worry…

Jack: Does it hurt???

me: Lice? No. Do you feel pain?

Jack: Ohhh I feel itchy!! Drive faster!

me: Relax. We will get the lice kit and shampoo you up and be all set.

Jack: Hurry!!

me: Here we are. Lets just look for the lice section.

Jack: You’re stalling!!! Will the lice die??

me: Yes.

Jack: Will they come back???

me: Maybe… (I’m trying to read lice boxes and answer his questions.)

Jack: Whaaaatt??!! Will I need a SHOT!!!???

me: Oh for Pete’s sake calm down. I’m trying to read these. No you won’t need a shot. Sheesh.

(By the way, I think I like this show. Even though it has the perverted dentist from Seinfeld in it ha ha. He’s pretty good!)

Anyway, I did the shampoo on Jack and was then forced to admit to myself that my head had been a little itchy for a bit. Ugh! I then treated myself to a lovely medicinal head wash. Then Jack and I got a great gel rub with a nit combing to follow. And thennnnn… I got to strip every stitch of bedding clothing rugs stuffed animals baseball hats couch cushions cat beds etc etc etc and either wash and dry them in hot, vacuum them, clean them with rubbing alcohol or stuff then into plastic bags only to be opened in 4 weeks time. I could have an open house tomorrow this place is so clean!

Jack: Can I tell people I have head lice?

me: I wouldn’t exactly be bragging about it ok? Just go to school like normal. The nurse says its ok.

Jack: Awww…

So now I’m on to episode 2 as the hot water replenishes for the next load of laundry and I wait for the dryer to end. I hope that this is our first and last lice experience!

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4 responses

  1. As the owner of Heartland Healthy Heads Lice Removal and Resource Center (www.heartlandhealthyheads.com), This story is all to common. When using over the counter products, be careful to follow the direction closely. Be very diligent when combing the nits out. I recommend a good metal lice comb. All the nits must be removed or you will end up with live bugs gain, even after the second round of treatment. Comb, Comb, Comb. Be patient it is a tedious process. If you don’t succeed you can call the professional nitpickers.

    http://www.heartlandhealthyheads.com

    Like

    September 25, 2013 at 8:17 am

    • Good to know!

      Like

      September 29, 2013 at 9:32 am

  2. Annette

    If you want to forgo the chemicals… buy a really cheap conditioner (Suave is fine), put a few drops of tea tree oil in it, coat scalp to roots thickly, wrap head in a turban of plastic wrap and leave on for 15 minutes. Then comb. The stuff smothers and kills the creepies. I used this method on Cassie when she was 3. It worked great.
    http://www.kidspot.com.au/familyhealth/Healthy-Living-30-ways-to-get-rid-of-head-lice+3023+190+article.htm

    Like

    October 4, 2013 at 6:20 am

    • I wish I knew that! Pesticide treatments are already complete.

      Like

      October 4, 2013 at 6:20 pm

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