me: Ohh we should put orange light bulbs in our driveway for Halloween! Whatcha think?
Jack: Meatballs.
me: Why.
Jack: MEATBALLS that’s why!!
me: In the lamps…
Jack: No like on aircraft carriers. Duh,
me: You’re asking me to put meatballs in the lights, and I’m the duh?
Jack: Sigh… They make light formations on aircraft carriers for planes to land. I went to the Air and Space Museum and that’s what they’re called.
me: Oh. Either way we aren’t putting meatballs in the lights.
…and in other news…
Jack: Guess what?? We found a butt wipe on the floor in the boy’s bathroom!! And it had poop on it!
me: How awesome.
Sh*t My 17-Year-Old Says 