I couldn't possibly make this sh*t up.

Free country

me: Go wash up and brush your teeth please.

Jack: (looks up from his drawing) No.

me: Uh, yeah, let’s go.

Jack: It’s a free country, Mom.

me: Not for kids, now get in there.

Jack: It’s a free country for everyone! Right?

me: Yes. However…Kids have to listen to their parents. It’s a free country for you when you’re an adult.

Jack: If it’s a free country then it’s free for everyone all the time!

me: Then how would kids know how to do anything? Their parents have to teach them and keep them safe and clean and fed … So it’s free but you do have to listen to your mom.

Jack: That means it’s like prison.

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