Conversations, Games

S.O.N.A.R. (A new definition)

me: What are you doing out here?

Jack: Playing.

me: Need some help?

Jack: Only if you want to play SONAR. And it’s not what you think.

me: Um, should I be scared?

Jack: Noooo! Do you want to know what it stands for?

me: Hmmmm… Ok…

Jack: Sounds of Nerf and Radar.

me: That doesn’t sound too bad.

Jack: Yeah thats because you haven’t played it yet!


Words coming from living room while 2 boys play Xbox

(I’m not condoning this, merely reporting)

Jack/Friend: Suck it! You just got served! No YOU got served! Your wife is calling you! Who’s Oprah?? I don’t know!?? Padme sucks! Help me R2!!! That’s SO unfair!!! Dress up like a girl now! Ohhhh I’m your ex boyfriend!! Hahahahaaaaa!


Lego Star Wars

This just came out of Jack’s mouth. I had to type it verbatim.

Jack: Once I was playing Lego Star Wars III the complete saga for XBox 360 and I was Obi-Wan Kenobi as a padwan fighting my older self in the Mos Eisley Cantina from tatooine 3 episodes later! Like I was walking around and I saw my older self and then I took out my light saber and I struck him like 4 times. He died and he went into another room. He didn’t strike me back. I just walked around and wandered into another episode. It was cool.

me: Uh…?

I just stumbled on this cool Star Wars photo site looking for a Lego Star Wars image. Check it out!

Conversations, Games

2 games of chess lost to a 7-year old

Yes he’s getting that good! I was surprised to see Jack picking up on some strategy, planning a move or two ahead, learning to “protect” one of his pieces from my potential next move against him. It’s Amazing to watch him learn…

I’m not exceptionally good at chess, I’m probably just average because I distract myself and hyper over-think my next moves. Plus, I just don’t care that much, haha. Jack, however, is really getting into it and sneaks up on me quite a bit. I’m past the stage of letting him win one of my pawns to make him feel good…now I have to watch my ass because he gets me in check and I’m starting to scramble. Very funny to see his progression.

Also, he likes to remember things his own way, which is sooo totally like me…

me: Remember, the king can only move one space at a time.

Jack: I know! I call him the British. Like that king. We beat him in the war against the redcoats so he’s slow and can only move one space.

me: Interesting…

Jack: The pawns are guards to me.

me: Yes they’re exactly like guards. They help protect the king.

Jack: I call the rooks the tough guys because they seem tough.

me: (laughing) You are too funny Jack… What about the queen?

Jack: She’s just the queen.

me: The knight?

Jack: He’s the “horse”. And don’t even ask me about this one…

me: The bishop? Why? What’s that called?

Jack: I don’t even know why we have this piece because when you turn it around it looks just like Miami undies!!

me: what the heck are you talking about?

Jack: Undies. That you would see in Miami.

(anyone wanna help me out with this…does the hat look like a speedo or something?)


2 reasons why iPads make great toys for kids

1. iPads keep kids quiet and still when you need to get actual work done.

2. See #1.



Scenario 1:

Jack: Where are we going?

me: We just have to stop home to get your uniform so we…

Jack: (cutting me off) NOOOOOOO!!!! I don’t WANT to go to TAE KWON DO!!! Can’t we just…

me: (cutting him off) You can use my iPad while we drive!

Jack: (stops yelling) Okay, hand it over.


Scenario 2:

me: Can you play nicely for a minute at my desk while I go and have a quick meeting?

Jack: Okay. Where are your scissors?

me: Why?

Jack: No reason. Can I see that stapler and the golf club in that guy’s cubicle? And some of that goop that you mix together to make a print of your teeth?

me: Don’t touch anything while I’m gone! Can’t you read your book?

Jack: No.

me: Want to play Angry Birds on the iPad?

Jack: Yesss!

me: You planned this all along didn’t you?

Jack: Of course. I don’t want to clean up whatever mess I would make with scissors and paper and all that stuff. Go to your little meeting now.



To spy or not to spy?

Jack: two boys are stalking us Mom! they went around the back of the building withOUT their parents and then they spied on us!!!

Me: Nooooo!

Jack: Very sarcastic, Mom. This is exciting stuff! We can spy back on them and catch them red handed!

Me: Doing what?

Jack: How the heck should I know. They’re spying on US! Sheesh! You’re not even listening to me.