I couldn't possibly make this sh*t up.

School

Less face-to-face these days

Remember the good old days where I used to post very long and in-depth commentary from Jack? Well, these days we don’t spend a lot of Face-time together. Jack usually has his headphones on, is doing homework, or is otherwise occupied… (Three hours of bathroom time anyone?)… Just saying!

That alone leads to a blog that doesn’t have as much shit in it as it used to :-). When we are together, and Jack unleashes a spectacular one liner, or he has a rambling monologue about something, and I want to blog about it… I generally get vetoed.

He has editorial approval now that he is older and more sensitive to embarrassing moments that would be for ever caught on the inter-webs.

The one or two shining moments that I get with him each day have a lot of content in them… That would make great blog posts… But, by the time I get around to blogging, I’ve generally forgotten the gist of the conversation :-). I would hate to say that Jack’s blog is winding down… Because I still love to write about him… But this may be a natural progression! I don’t know of too many other blogs that have tracked their child since age 5 tight into the teenage years. If you know of any, please comment and let me know 🙂

me: Do you want me to make your lunch today?

Jack: —-

me: Helloooooo.

Jack: (big show of slowly removing headphones) What?

me: Oy, take your headphones off.

Jack: (grunt)

me: Do you want school lunch today?

Jack: No, the food is disgusting and unrecognizable. However… the pasta is awesome!

me: School pasta is awesome huh?

Jack: —-

me: Helloooo!

Jack: (slowly removing headphones) Whaaaasatttt…

me: Nevermind.

And there you have it. Monday through Friday people! Actually I now have the “no headphones at breakfast rule” so we can actually say a few words before he runs out the door at (gasp) 6:45. Ungodly hour!!

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First day of high school (OMG)

So yeah, that happened. Middle school flew by, winter lasted for like 12 months, summer flew by, and here we are at the first day of high school.

Wasn’t I just holding a newborn? Anyway, the first day of high school ended up being a half day due to the heat and humidity. Welcome to Connecticut. We actually have people from Florida say “holy crap its hot up here” when they visit in August. That should give you an indication of what we deal with every summer. LOL.

I was allowed to take two photos of Jack in the driveway this morning, approved by him, but I am not allowed to post them on Instagram. Only Facebook…and I’m making the executive decision to allow myself to post them also on WordPress. Lucky you, fans of the sh*t Jack says!

I was also allowed to walk Jack partially to the bus stop, with Moca in tow of course, and watch him from a distance with the other teenagers, heads bent over their devices, thumbs a-tappin’, waiting for the bus.

As we walked… Sigh… Moca spotted a squirrel and almost tore my arm off with the ferocity of her lunge.

me: Aaahhhhh!! Moca!!! No!!! Leave it!!! Geezzzzzz… This dog is going to drive me to drink! Or at least say some very nasty things right now!!!!

Jack: You mean she’ll drive you to write a not-so-nice letter to a congressman.

(He does know me pretty well hahahaha.)

To Jack: I hope the next 4 years are everything you hope they will be…much fun, much learning, new friends, some mischief (within legal limits), and many memories to take with you when you go to college. In a blink you will be a senior graduating and tossing your cap in the air. I’m going to try and slow down time for just a little bit longer.

💙💙💙


May the 4th be with you!

Spoilers.

This post has nothing to do with Star Wars.

Jack: Hurry up and sign my permission slips. They’re due tomorrow!!!

me: Where are they?

Jack: In my backpack!

me: Leave them for me and I’ll sign them.

(Next day)

Jack:!We’re gonna be late! You have to sign these! You didn’t remember yesterday!

me: Leave them on the counter.

(How is this my fault?)

me: Ok, here you go. Hey, for the band parade it says they need parents to walk along and hand out waters and stuff. Want me to do that?

Jack: NO.

me: Well someone has to do it. Then who will walk?

Jack: Anyone but you.


Test grades and why studying is so important…

Jack: Mom, I got back a Spanish test today.

me: Oh yeah? What’d you get? (Usually Jack trucks me into thinking he did poorly when actually he got a 100.

Jack: 15 out of 30. So not very good.

me: Really? How come you didn’t do that well, did you not study? I don’t remember you studying here so I hope you did in school…

Jack: Not Really.

me: Jack, if you have a test then the days leading up to the test are for studying. You know that.

Jack: it’s usually easy but I did t understand the questions. Oh and by the way, I have another Spanish test tomorrow.

me: Come on Jack, time to study! Get out your book and I’ll help you.

We flip to the page and I start to read exclamations in Spanish which have two answers to choose from as responses. You have to pick the most appropriate response to the first sentence.

me: Okay tell me what this means.. (I read the first exclamation.)

Jack: That means My feet are sore.

me: Ok answer A. Says Don’t take off your shoes and B. Says Take off your shoes. Which is the appropriate response?

Jack. A.

me: Huh? Jack, their feet hurt so why would you say to keep your shoes on. It’s B. Take off your shoes. I can see why your grade was low, it’s not Spanish we need to work on it’s your English! Sheesh.

Jack: This takes place in Argentina, which is full of broken glass probably, so they shouldn’t take their shoes off.

me: ??

Jack: Ok read the next one.

me: (reading poorly in Spanish) Ok what’s that mean?

Jack: it says “I’m tired”.

me: Answer A. Says to go to bed and answer B. Says to get up. Which is the correct response?

Jack: B.

me: Seriously? It’s A Jack… He’s tired so he should go to bed.

Jack: When I’m tired you make me get up for school so A is the right answer.

me: Grrrrrrrrrr…


School lunch woes

Jack: ugh I ate too much at lunch today. It made me kind of sick.

me: What did you have?

Jack: Stomach pains.

😝😝😝


Half-scale Tissue Box

Words I never thought I’d type in the same sentence haha.

I found this box in my office at work and laughed. Everyone always commented on the mini tissue box and it’s been here for months… maybe even since last summer. I can’t quite remember when jack made it.

I move it from surface to surface when I clean. Very rare indeed. And today I moved it again and happened to look at the bottom.

Too funny. Jack has a great sense of humor and he always cracks me up. I’m still working on getting him to use his powers for good! Not evil! 🙂

I recently went to his school conferences and each teacher pretty much had the exact same story to tell:

Jack is a very good student and a lot of fun to have in class. He seems to really enjoy learning and participates quite frequently. He’s known for his humor and one-liners, and if something comical is going on, Jack is probably in the middle of it. We moved his seat so that he wasn’t so centrally located and his friends were moved to the other side. Jack is very smart and does the work very quickly. He might be a bit distracting when he finishes so we are working on having Jim slow down a bit.

me: Jack, I told them to give you another assignment if you complete your work that fast….

Jack: What? How come? I’m smart enough to get it done quick so I shouldn’t get punished.

me: Well… you can’t distract the other kids that need the extra time to do their work.

Jack: That’s not fair.

me: It was sort of a joke so I don’t really think they’ll do that. But all your teachers really like having you in class.

Jack: That’s because I’m likable.

me: And modest.


Quote of the day -sick at school

Jack had a cold last week for a couple of days and we doctored him up and sent him to school anyway. It wasn’t that terrible, and he didn’t have a fever, but he had a sore throat and was kind of rundown.

Sad to say it hit me on Friday, I perked up yesterday, and today I feel like dog poop. But I just tend to ignore it and then it usually goes away … kind of like a Jedi mind trick :-).

I was talking to Jack about his sore throat and asked if it made it hard for him to talk in class. (Which might actually be a good thing LOL).

Jack: Nooooo. I actually talk the most in the classes I hate so I can get those teachers sick.

Such a nice boy… 🙂