Oh that’s right, I said it. (snap!). You have a big butt.
And by “you” I mean “me”.
At least according to some little person I know, who stands about ohhhh … butt high.
Jack: Hey can you move it?
me: You mean excuse me?
Jack: Yeah, if you were smaller I wouldn’t have to say excuse me.
Jack: (walks around to stare at my butt, and then pokes it) Your butt is big.
me: Is this how you want your night to end?
Jack: (poke poke) You should lose some weight.
me: You do know that grown ups are bigger than 6 year olds, right?
Jack: I know that! But still, maybe a diet?
me: And we’re stronger. (he doesn’t get the hint…)
Jack: (looks at my front) Why do ladies always have to lose weight?
me: Who’s telling you this by the way??
Jack: No one! I made this up all by myself.
me: Great. I happen to think my butt is the perfect size for my body. Thank you very much.
Jack: It doesn’t matter if YOU think it’s perfect, it matters if OTHER people think it is.
(click if you dare)