The sheriff

Jack: those darts are still up there!

(Referring to the skylights that have NERF darts stuck to them)

me: Oh yeah that’s from “friend” remember? You met him in NYC?

Jack: He was at our house?

me: Well yes, he slept on the couch once last year on his way to upstate New York.

Jack: (glaring) BTDubs I like meeting people BEFORE they sleep on our couch!