Quote of the day – weapons

me: Doesn’t your friend like her? Won’t he be mad you’re buying her a necklace?

Jack: Nah he won’t care, he’s my best friend.

me: Oh that’ll change when you get older. Are you telling him?

Jack: What for?

me: Well I guess all’s fair in love and war.

Jack; You mean all’s fair in love and NERF!!!!

Conversations, Subaru Confessions

Subaru Confessions – Part 7

I thought this picture was funny. And it relates to my post. Really.


Of course I tucked Jack into bed tonight and woke up next to him a few minutes ago drooling on his pillow. So many stuffed animals, I was so tired, who could resist?

Jack had an excellent week in school. His spelling tests have been perfect. No “notes” or apology letters have come home in his backpack. Whew. The bus driver said she hasn’t had to speak to him about running up and down the aisles in over a week. Okay, I’m exaggerating on that one. But he did get spoken to for not listening to her or not sitting or something. I thought it was time for a trip to the toy store. A giant nerf gun was on our list. I reminded Jack that when you have excellent behavior on the bus and in school, and when all of your work is done correctly, AND when you don’t give your Mom any trouble, presents will follow. Funny that 7 year olds don’t yet retain that little bit of info.

We also had cereal for dinner. A sweet kind. I don’t do sweet cereals with Jack. He’s never had Lucky Charms or Froot Loops or Frankenberry. This time I let him pick. Only a few requirements, after all I couldn’t let all of the rules slip. Rule 1: Cereal has to have LESS than 10 grams of sugar per serving. I can’t give my child 17 grams of sugar in one bowl and then watch him down 4 bowls in one sitting. GASP! Rule 2: No high fructose corn syrup. Just because. It’s a chemical people. Rule 3: List of ingredients has to be small. Luckily most cereals follow that rule. Rule 4: No tree nuts. Well, that should be rule #1 but you get the idea.

(Okay, and technically I said we could have cereal for dessert if Jack ate some of the leftover butternut squash, chicken and corn…He was like “Oh yeah!”. And I’m thinking…you just ate a real dinner and the cereal is kind of a snack now, but whatever. And he didn’t go for 4 bowls because he filled up on veggies. I might be onto something here. How about “you can have this bag of M&Ms for DINNER if you eat this salad first.” Hee hee.)

So which cereal did he pick?

A favorite from my childhood. The box has a new “mascot” now. This wolf-looking thing. Remember this guy? (If you scroll down on that page there’s a Cookie Crisp video from the 80’s. Cool! That blog is also a fun read, so look around!) Uh oh, I just started reading through the blog, clicked on a link to Amazon, and bought this. Okay I gotta go to sleep for realz.

Back to the cereal…

The funny part is, it doesn’t taste the same as I remember. Do they actually change the cereals after a few decades or do our taste buds change? Weigh in!

Okay, here are a few tidbits from the ride to and from the store. Do kids say “tidbits” anymore or just us old people. Sh*t. Or should I say “Bird Sh*t”.


Jack: I’d like to be a bird

me: Birds don’t get nerf guns.

Jack: I’m glad I’m a person then! But birds get to poop on soldier’s uniforms.

me: ?

(I watched Jack hold his nerf gun in the back seat with little boy joy on his face.)

me: Guess what?

Jack: What?

me: I love you.

Jack: You always say that. You have to do better than that.


me: So what did you have for lunch today?

Jack: I got the grilled cheese. Man they have the BEST grilled cheese ever. Soooo good.

me: What makes it good?

Jack: I don’t know, extra grease or something?

me: Do your friends like it too?

Jack: Yeah. No one gets the vegetarian chili. And I mean no one. It’s disgusting.

me: So no vegetarians in 3rd grade?

Jack: No. You put a hot dog in front of any one of them and they’ll eat it. Watch.

(I guess hot dogs are the “meat” of choice for non-vegetarian 3rd graders)


(Journey “Separate Ways” came on the radio. I started singing.)

Jack: You know this song??

me: Yeah, I loved it when I was little. I think it came out when I was like 12 or 13.

Jack: Oh boy, and everyone knows what happens at that age!

me: What??

Jack: You start to go crazy. I’m not looking forward to my teens.


My gun and how it looks

me: Let’s hit the road.

Jack: To where??

me: Anywhere. Park? Playground? Movies? What do you want to do?

Jack: I don’t care as long as I can bring my nerf guns. Can you drive the getaway car?

me: Sure, but just don’t go pointing that at any other cars. We don’t want to get in trouble.

Jack: Anyone can see that this is orange and yellow…NOT real!

me: I know, but let’s not push it okay?

So we head out to the movies, The Lorax (pretty good!), and then the nature center (closed) and then the playground behind the nature center (deserted of all kids on this beautiful day). Jack has his old super-soaker gun in hand, minus the big water tank because “it doesn’t look cool if it’s not full of water mom”.

me: Taking your gun on the slide?

Jack: You never know when the AT-ATs or Count Dooku will show up… (he looks around panicked)

me: Let’s take a walk around this path. Go ahead. Bring the gun. (We walk around the quarter-mile mowed path that meanders around the property of the nature center.)

Jack: Okay let’s go back to the base.

me: Base?

Jack: (harsh whisper) Rock Wall!

me: Oh. Gotcha. Well, what a nice day, eh? Warm sun, no litter, not too windy.

Jack: (looking down at his shadow) And the shadow of my gun looks GREAT…

me: Yes, the gun. Marvelous!

Jack: Okay I’ll toss the gun to you if I see any bad guys! (he plays for awhile and then we take a break on the bench)

me: Ahhh, a warm bench, this tiny pine cone and my little boy. Not a bad day.

Jack: Carrot Mark… your “cute” little boy.

me: Don’t edit my moments please.

Jack: Sometimes I just have to.