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I Am Undie Man!

me: Um, are you done in there??

Jack: Yeah. Can you —

me: (I interrupt) No, you wipe your own butt please.

Jack: (coming out of the bathroom, shirt off, shorts off, underwear half on) I am Undie Man!!!

me: (chuckling) Saving the planet in your undies?

Jack: (raises his hands over his head) No!! Undies halfway down, I am terrorizing everyone!!!

me: Sigh…