Come on, you know I have to say it that way. Our trainer at the gym never got the hang of saying Tough Mudder…it was always “Quit whining, you guys wanna live through this Tough Mother event don’t you?” We’d all yell out “Mudder!” And he’d make us do 100 jump squats. So we stopped correcting him. But let me tell you, those jump squats got our fat butts up Gunstock Mountain in NH 4 times in 4 hours. So, yeah…
Anyway, if you hadn’t already guessed, I completed another Tough Mudder event. 1.5 times to be exact. Sort of . Ha. We finished the first 12-mile course and then decided to run back to the start for some more fun. After about 5 miles, we headed downhill to the shuttle buses. Yeah, we were beat. It was 95 degrees on that mountain yo! But, once again, all the cuts and bruises were well worth it.
Jack spent the weekend with his dad and again missed all the fun. I had the weekend that was a comedy of errors…first when we got locked out of our condo because we finished the race first and our teammate had the key…second, when my neighbor called to tell me that Jack’s sitter locked the house up and didn’t give him the key, thereby leaving our pets without food (meaning I needed to drive home that night instead of staying over until Sunday)…and third…yeah I did drive home that same night, 4.5 hours, getting home around midnight, to realize that yeah, my keys were locked in the house too. I had no spare. The garage clicker was locked in the garage. So I did what any other tough mother would do. I threw a brick at a window. Only to watch it bounce off, repeatedly. We have the safest house on the planet. I then picked up a huge garden wall rock and hurled it at the back door window. Bounce. Sigh. My neighbor came out and asked if we needed a glass cutter. He’s good like that! We scored and scored (well, okay, he did) and then we smashed it with a hammer. Do you know what happens to glass like that when you hit it with a hammer? It goes freaken everywhere. My entire kitchen, hallway and deck were buried in glass shards. (typed that as “sharts” like 3 times ha ha)
So…after 2 hours of cleaning up glass (I hadn’t even SHOWERED yet people!) I then was able to clean mud out of me privates and go to flippin bed. Who else could do all that in one day. Pfft, not a DAD! 🙂 Kidding. Settle down.
Okay, I needed to get that out. Thanks.
Today I was talking to my mom on the phone. Jack was reading and eavesdropping. He’s awesome at that!
me: So, yeah, we had a fun time up until we had to smash the back door in to get into the house. … Yeah, I’m getting a quote from the guy on Saturday to fix it.
Jack: (pops his head up from his book) Whaddya mean…quote? You mean like “Ask not what your country can do for you, ask what you can do for your country???”
He’s playing JFK in his biography presentation next week. What can I say. He is SO in character.
Sh*t My 6-Year-Old Says (but he's 18 now) 