Pets, Uncategorized

What’s that on the rug?

efb2faca-0622-43b6-b166-52b6aab37aed

Typical question in my house. It could be anything really. Dog puke. Cat puke. Hairballs. Muddy footprints. Sometimes it’s all four at once. Add in a clumsy episode by yours truly and I’d say it’s a party.

me: What the…?? (I almost stepped in a giant puddle of water and grass on my floor. It looked like someone spilled a salad. Thanks Moca!)

I cleaned up the mess and headed into the kitchen.

me: Aaaaagghhh! (I almost stepped in a brownish blob of a hairball mixed with cat food. Rug cleaner, soap, paper towels… I had hardly gone 5 feet and was starting to break a sweat.)

That mess cleaned up, I finally made it into the kitchen to start making lunch. I grabbed the container of hummus, and… whoops! It slipped right out of my hands and plopped on the floor sort of imploding and exploding all at the same time. It was like a hummus meteor had landed right in the middle of my kitchen. The animals started circling like sharks.

me: Back, back! No no no nononononooooo! Out! (one foot up holding Moca back, the other foot hopping to keep the cats away from the mess. More paper towels and soap. More sweat.)

I cleaned up the floor and salvaged what was left in the container for my lunch. Mom’s always get floor scraps for lunch. Sheesh.

me: Jaaaack! We need to leave. Now!

Jack comes downstairs ready for camp and we head down to the garage.

Jack: Hey, you know the big creature in Stranger Things? The bloody slimy one?

me: Yeahhhh…? (what is he getting at)

Jack: Well, there was something that looked just like that in the living room just now.

me: What??!1 What was it?

Jack: I don’t know but it was big. And gross.

me: Why didn’t you go see or pick it up?

Jack: I’m not touching that.

me: Touching what??

Jack: It looked like a croissant.

me: Breat? Was it Moca’s bone?

Jack: No it was way bigger than that. It was also kinda dark and slimy. It’s right over by the speaker and the fireplace. You can’t miss it.

me: Apparently I can miss it. I was busy cleaning up Moca’s grass puke, the cat’s hairball and the hummus I spilled.

Jack: Not the hummus!

me: I saved some don’t worry. (the hummus in our town is soooooo good…) So I get to come home to a giant slimy dark wet croissant in front of the fireplace.

Jack: Pretty much.

me: Gee thanks.

Later that evening…

Jack: Hey it’s gone?

me: What?

Jack: Whatever it was on the rug.

I head over to inspect. there is a football shaped stain on the white carpet. Faint, but I can tell something was there. Something I’d rather not speculate about.

We’re not sure which animal it came from or which animal ate it but all I know is that it was one less thing I needed to clean!

Who looks guilty? PoBo, Luna or Moca???

🙂 Definitely the cats haha…

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Conversations, Digital Technology

Text Us Back, Please.

It’s not bad enough that we can’t have a full normal conversation with our teen… but now even when we talk to them on their digital turf, via text, we still get shunned.

me: I know you read those texts…

Jack: So?

me: So… answer back. Why do you read my texts and not answer? It’s not hard to say good morning ya know.

Jack: You text at the most inopportune times!

me: Morning is inopportune?

Jack: Whenever is inopportune.

me: Grrrr. And “bruh” is not an acceptable replacement for “good morning”…

Travel, Uncategorized

Jack says hi

Are there any other parents out there that suddenly aren’t allowed to take photos of their kids?

We watch them grow, we mark the milestones, we make literal marks on a wall as they get taller, and suddenly the “photo album” has a lot of blank pages in it.

Wait, when did my child grow a mustache? Oh it must have been between the ages of 14 and 15 where there is no photographic proof!

Right now I’m sitting on the train with Jack headed to NYC. This is the first time I’ve ridden with him this year. This year! I used to take him every other week. Moca and I would ride happily along and then either turn right around and come home, or take a walk around the city.

This year, however, Jack has insisted on riding the train alone. It saves me 5 hours of travel time for which I’m usually grateful, but I miss the rides with him. I miss taking Moca along and having her get so much attention for being such a good girl.

So, right now, Jack is sitting across from me, passed out asleep, mouth open catching flies, as they say, and boy would I like some photographic proof to show you all.

Ugh. I won’t share a photo .

But…Boy do I want to.

😆😆😆

me: Jack, here’s a few seats here. Look it has a lot of leg room.

Jack: No, lets go find an open 3-seater.

me: I hate sitting in those. Let’s go in this 6-seater.

Jack: Ugh then we’ll get jammed in when people sit next to us.

me: No one is going to get on after Stamford, we’re fine. Look how much room we have.

A few stops later…

Art, Conversations, Food, Uncategorized

Hey! With the knife!

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As a throwback to art school, where I always had an X-acto knife in my hand, I now currently do everything in my kitchen while holding a butcher knife (of some sort). I cut fruit, then use the knife to jimmy open a can of dog food, then use it to scoop and dice the food into Moca’s food bowl, and when not in use, the knife conveniently swivels back around in my hand so the handle is in my palm and the blade juts out the back. Very similar to art school. I had a lot of cuts back then. (Practice safe X-acto-ing people.)

using-an-x-acto-knife

Jack: The knife!

me: Sorry, I was just reaching for the carrots.

Jack: Don’t reach for them with the knife hand!

me: (pointing with the knife) Can you hand me the…

Jack: Gah! Put it down!

And so on and so forth. I just do everything with a knife in my hand. The other day I was chopping vegetables and then had an itch on my face. Let me tell you, since that knife has become like another appendage off my hand, I almost lost an eye!

me: (turning to get something out of the fridge) Hey, excuse me. I need to get in here.

Jack: With the knife again! (he dodges to the side).

me: Yeah, I really have to figure this out.

It’s pretty much a habit now. I’m really trying to break it! Really!

And now for some cool X-acto art with food. Because I like it. 🙂

avo2avozucc

Camp, Conversations, Uncategorized

Happy first day of summer!

(And I’m late with this post. Don’t judge! I was all ready to finish this up but then had to work, run home at lunch for Jack and Moca, sitbkn crazy rush hour traffic, meet a contractor after work, drive Jack to his GFs house, takenMoca to the dog park, walk with my friend and then eat dinner and pass out… sooooo…. anyway read on!)

😂

We are still here though have been quiet for a few weeks. Very sorry about that!

The end of school, and at the beginning of summer planning has taken up every ounce of my free time.

Jack has started rowing camp, a.k.a. crew, and is enjoying it so far… That happens every afternoon… And he will also be a counselor in training at an outdoor camp in town. So that boy is going to be busy and in super shape by the end of the summer 🙂

What have y’all been up to in the last few weeks?

Today is the first day of summer and the longest day of the year so normally I stay home and enjoy it, but today I worked simply because I forgot! 😱 Can i still blame new mom brain?

Jack spent the day home playing video games and “walking” the dog. Ha. But Moca seemed happy so I’m sure it was all good.

On the way to Jack’s GFs house we had a chance to talk. Or as Jack says: Mom I don’t even have to talk because you ask questions and then you answer them yourself.

Oy.

me: How are you feeling? Still sore from rowing?

Jack: Yeah.

me: You’re gonna be in really good shape by the end of the summer.

Jack: Grunt.

me: I know it’s been raining a lot but it’s going to get sunny and hot soon so you’ll have to wear sunblock for rowing.

Jack: Mhmmm.

me: So you don’t get all sunburned.

Jack: I know what sunblock is for.

me: Do you wear a hat in the boat? Do they let you? Because you might want to wear one to protect the top of your head and keep the sun out of your eyes.

Jack: I know what a hat’s for.

me; My first really really bad sunburn was in a boat when I was about your age. I forgot sunblock and my face burned to a crisp so like a week later big strips were peeling off. It was so bad.

Jack: They didn’t have sunblock back then.

me: They did but no one cared .

😫😫😫

Remember the days of baby oil and sitting on the roof of the shed to tan?

I do.

Happy summer!

Conversations, School

Law of atracción

Jack and I were talking about the Law of Attraction and how if you put your mind on something and think about it positively, it will eventually come your way.

I tried it recently and was focusing on more leisure time. I got a promotion this year which meant longer hours and more work, and I started to feel as if the days were just too short. For a few weeks I focused on me having enough leisure time to go for a run in the morning, get some chores done, and maybe have some time to do things with Jack.

Enter Jury Duty.

I didn’t see this as a “more free time” type of commitment, however that’s exactly what it provided to me. The start time was approximately one hour later than my work time so I have been going for a run in the morning (and thank goodness the sun decided to finally show itself this week!). The case called for lots of lawyer meetings which meant that us jurors had many breaks. I got to READ A BOOK DURING THE DAY! Also, we had a few days with very long lunch hours. I got to GO HOME AND WALK THE DIG AND EAT LUNCH AND SIT ON THE DECK IN THE SUN.

And… I was home maybe a half hour early which allowed us to take a bike ride and go to the mall DURING THE WEEK.

Then I realized… leisure time .Ahhhh.

Now back to Jack. And the car ride.

me: See? It really does work. You should try it today seriously.

Jack: But what should I focus on.

me: How about your Spanish test? Picture getting a 100 on it. Actually picture it coming back to you with that grade written on it. Wouldn’t that make you happy.

Jack: Worth a shot.

Later that day… 👍👍👍👍👍

So there you have it ladies and gentlemen. Give it a try. Start small, stay positive, and really believe it. Trust me, it works.

Conversations, Emotions, Potty Humor, Uncategorized

Affirmations vs. Reality

I drove Jack to school as I do every day, and we rode in silence for awhile. I asked if he wanted to listen to my audio book in the car “Money and the Law of Attraction”. I’m almost done with it. He politely declined. So I put it on anyway. 🙂

Esther Hicks was talking about illness, and how you can think yourself healthy with positive vibes, etc.

me: Hey, you should try positive thinking today and say some affirmations to yourself to kick off the day.

Jack: (grunts)

me: Like try this: “I can do anything I want today and it’s going to be a great day.”

Jack: I just detonated your car.

me: What? (Pause) Oh geez Jack come on!

I hastily rolled down all the windows.

Jack: Ha!

And there you have it. Affirmations vs. reality with a 14-year-old. Kinda gross eh?