I couldn't possibly make this sh*t up.

Too fast for math!

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Wow, so this is what it’s like to sit at a computer and type a blog post. I type 99% of my posts on my phone. Stupid gaming thumb pain… Stupid auto correct… Stupid not enough bells and whistles on the WordPress app… Stupid small screen that I have to turn sideways to see (sometimes…when it’s dark out.. ahem). Now I’m sitting luxuriously (see I wouldn’t use a big word like that on the phone. Too many thumb taps…) LUXURIOUSLY at my desk and typing pretty darn fast. Ha, no mistakes either. Or so I think…

My boy is home from NYC. Took the 1:04 train, or whatever, and got there around 2:30. I had a cheeseburger (hot off the grill)    with ketchup, and a hard boiled egg waiting for him. Yep, he inhaled both. I don’t think he gets protein in NYC. Well maybe sometimes, but I knew he’d be starving.

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As we drove, I told him about my morning laps around the school track. He grunted as he ate the burger in 3 bites and the egg in 2.

Jack: What?

me: I just finished the story. Really?

Jack: Sorry. I wasn’t listening.

me: I SAID I did laps this morning around the track. It’s 1/4 mile and I did 16…so how many miles is that?

Jack: (blank stare)

me: Huh? (he’s super good at math, so this was like duh, easy)

Jack: 3?

me: Are you even listening to the equation? Each lap, quarter mile. Did 16. A quarter of 16?

Jack: Oh yeah, 4. Anyway I’m just too fast for math. I was already onto something else.

me: If you were too fast, wouldn’t you have at least gotten the right answer?

Jack: I would have to care…

me: Nice.

Jack: By the way, you’re looking extra … MUSHY!

He reaches forward to try and grab under my arm, which I now know simply means he loves me.

I’ll take what I can get.

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